Cornerstone of Hope

Cornerstone’s support groups are an opportunity for you/your family to connect with other people who experienced a similar loss, to help you to see that you are not alone and that your feelings are normal, and to participate in a professionally led group counseling experience. Groups are broken down by age and types of loss so that they best meet your needs. Each group begins with dinner or light refreshments and some time to meet others who are going through similar loss experiences. A time of sharing and support will follow.

Orientation for Taking FLIGHT (Families Living in Grief and Healing Together) is an opportunity for you to complete necessary paperwork, visit and become familiar with Cornerstone of Hope, work together on a family project, and introduce yourself to other group members. We seek to help you become familiar and more comfortable with what will be happening over the next eight weeks.

Groups are facilitated by two licensed professionals (Master’s level clinicians who are social workers, counselors, and/or art therapists) and offer a place to discuss emotional, relational, and spiritual needs in a safe, supportive atmosphere. Counselors will spend time educating you about grief, including what grief looks like, typical grief feelings, how to survive the holidays, etc., and assist you in developing better coping and decision-making skills.

Each weekly group session is one and a half hours long and meets weekly for eight weeks. Upon completion of the eight-week initial grief support program, you may participate in monthly group sessions. However, participating in initial grief support (whether through Cornerstone of Hope’s eight-week program, your church, or another program) is a prerequisite to participating in Cornerstone’s monthly group sessions.

Monthly group sessions typically last two hours, and you can attend as often as you like (some have been attending consistently for years, others come every couple of months). Monthly workshops are more social and educational experiences than the weekly groups, which involve more intense grief-related discussion as needed.

Many community support groups are peer-led. Cornerstone believes healing is more successful when groups are led by professionals who are experts in grief support. In addition, Cornerstone’s groups are separated into loss-specific groups in order to best meet the needs of those attending (for example, infant loss groups, military loss groups, suicide loss groups, young widows groups, teen groups, children’s groups, family groups, etc.). Finally, Cornerstone is one of the few grief centers in the country that offers support to the whole family. Our groups are divided according to age (children, teens, parents/guardians), and are designed to allow your family to attend on the same evening and receive age-appropriate grief support.

Cornerstone’s support groups are eight weeks in length, and new groups begin quarterly. Because it is important for groups to develop camaraderie amongst one another, and because of the amount of information missed, new members will not be added to a group in progress after week two of the eight week session. Instead, those wishing to join Cornerstone in the midst of a program are invited to meet with a counselor one-on-one until the next 8-week session begins.

Adult groups are offered without charge to those participating. There is a materials fee of $25 per family for all family groups. Family workshops are typically free, with the exception of a few activities that may happen at the family workshops (e.g., butterfly release, bowling). Camps are also free of charge. Cornerstone of Hope also provides free babysitting and a light meal/refreshments for all weekly and monthly groups offered.

For all weekly groups, we ask that you attend each of the eight weekly sessions provided. For monthly groups, you many select any/all groups you wish to attend, based on the topic/activity that interests you.

Every potential group member will come into Cornerstone of Hope for a one-on-one meeting with a counselor, at which time we will discuss groups and determine if your situation is appropriate for attending a weekly group. Losses that are very new (less than three months) may require some time/individual counseling before you are ready for group support.

For more information about events, click here or contact us at 216.524.HOPE(4673).

Cornerstone has counselors with specialized training to work with children, teens, and adults, whether they are being counseled as individuals, couples, or families. A child must be at least six years old to attend individual counseling. For younger children, Cornerstone counselors will work with parents/guardians as to how to best support a very young child.

Counseling begins with an initial meeting with the therapist to gather information and history in order to develop a plan to meet each individual’s/family’s needs. After this intake appointment, you will be assigned to a counselor and will meet at a mutually agreed upon time for a suggested time frame (e.g., weekly, bi-weekly, etc.). Counseling may include individual, group, and/or family sessions.

Appointments are typically available Monday through Thursday from 8:00 a.m. until 8:00 p.m., Friday from 8:00 a.m. until 5:00 p.m., and Saturday from 9:00 a.m. until 12:00 p.m. These daytime, evening, and weekend appointments are made available depending on your therapist. Please call or e-mail for availability. Call us at 216.524.HOPE(4673) or email us at support@cornerstoneofhope.org.

Each session typically lasts 60 minutes. Your therapist will establish with you a regular schedule based on your specific need. You may attend counseling several times or may choose to continue counseling until you have met your goals for healing.

There is a one time flat fee (broken down into per session fees if preferable) based on income level for an unlimited number of individual counseling services. However, no one is denied service based on inability to pay. Please contact us at 216.524.HOPE(4673) for more specific information/rates.

All of your conversations with the Cornerstone of Hope staff are completely confidential (except where mandated otherwise by law, as in the case of child abuse and/or elder abuse or imminent danger to yourself or others). Cornerstone of Hope is HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) compliant and all clients are required to sign a HIPAA form prior to services being rendered. Cornerstone of Hope does not bill insurance (see below), but we do bill EAPs (Employee Assistance Programs).

Yes. Teenagers and children are often helped by having individual sessions, participating in a group, art therapy, music therapy, photography, and other creative therapies, or through family therapy. Teenagers can help the therapist decide what works best for them.

Each of our staff members has either a Master’s degree in counseling or psychology and training in loss and bereavement. Each is registered by the State of Ohio to practice counseling. Each of our staff members also has specialized advanced training in specific areas of need. Our trainees are advanced students enrolled in a graduate program in counseling, social work, or art therapy. They are also under the supervision of a licensed therapist. Please review each counselor’s bio for more information regarding their specialized advanced training.

The number of sessions depends on several factors, including but not limited to the goals for therapy, the severity of the issues encountered, and of course, a client’s willingness to actively participate. Your counselor will work with you to best meet your counseling needs and counseling will last for a mutually agreed upon time frame.

Please call us at least 24 hours in advance of your session if you need to reschedule.

Cornerstone of Hope does not accept insurance, as there is no way to bill for grief counseling under the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual), which is the book of diagnoses for insurance companies.

You and your therapist will set goals, determine the most appropriate length of treatment, and discuss therapeutic choices. The benefit of that is that you pay less because we don’t spend valuable hours on insurance paperwork. In addition, insurance requires diagnosis to authorize treatment. These negative labels can follow a client through life and interfere with insurability later. At Cornerstone, your files are not shared with anyone (except where mandated by law).

Cornerstone’s office is located in Independence, Ohio (near Cleveland) at 5905 Brecksville Road, Independence, Ohio, 44131. Click here for a map and for directions to our office. Office hours are Monday through Thursday, 8:00 a.m. – 8:00 p.m., Friday 8:00 a.m. – 5:00 p.m. and Saturday 9:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m.

Simply contact us and we will match you with a therapist that best meets your needs and schedule an intake appointment for you. Call us at 216.524.HOPE(4673) or email us at support@cornerstoneofhope.org.
Children and Teens:
Should a child go to a funeral? If a child has never been to a funeral before, explain what the funeral is all about before asking them if they would like to attend. Children often want to know how they can contribute and show their love in a special way. Picking out a song to play, or allowing them to put a special memento, note, or drawing into the casket are good ways of helping them feel involved.

Under the age of 5: It is usually not necessary to take an infant or toddler to a funeral. They are unable to understand what is happening and will likely be upset by the intense emotions they witness. It is also difficult to get infants and toddlers to sit still for a ceremony. Funeral homes allow private viewings of the body for families. It is often a better option to allow a small child to view the body in a more private setting along with people close to them. Before the viewing, it is important to prepare the child for what he/she is about to see. Someone should be available who can answer questions about the body and explain death in a basic and concrete manner to the child. Remember that children under the age of five are not developmentally able to understand that death is permanent. They will continue to ask when “grandpa” is coming back. It is important to remind the child that “grandpa” is not able to come back without showing frustration.

Ages 5 and older: If a child is five or older, they should be prepared for the funeral and accompanied by someone who can stay with them throughout the ceremony in case they have questions or need to leave. This should be someone close to but not directly involved with what is going on. This person should be an emotional support for the child/teen and not overwhelmed by his/her own grief. Children/teens should not be forced to attend the funeral but should always be given the opportunity. They often feel hurt and angry if they are not permitted to attend, as though they are not part of the family. It is best to talk to your children and see what they want to do. Everyone’s needs are different.

Begin by explaining in age appropriate terms what a funeral is, why it takes place, and what they may see and experience at the funeral.

Examples:

The Funeral: A funeral is a time when people come together to remember the person who died. There is usually a clergy person (priest, pastor, rabbi, etc.) who talks about the person who died and comforts those who have come to the service. Sometimes friends or family members may get up and talk and share stories. Sometimes the stories make people laugh, and that is okay. After the funeral there is usually a time for people to get together and visit and eat. There may also be a trip to the cemetery after the funeral and a few more words will be said while everyone stands around the casket in the grass. The casket will be buried after all of the people leave.

The Body: Usually the person’s body is lying in a casket. A casket is a fancy box sometimes made of wood or metal that looks like a silky bed on the inside. The person’s body might look like he/she is sleeping, but he/she is not sleeping. The body is dead which means it is not breathing, the heart is not beating and the body is not cold or hungry. A dead person does not wake up, but a sleeping person does.

Sometimes the casket is open and people can see the body and sometimes the casket is shut. The body looks different than it did when the person was living. There is make-up on the person to help them look nice.

Cremation: Sometimes a person’s body is cremated. This is another way to care for the body after the person dies. Instead of burying the body in the ground, the body is placed in a special room that heats to a high temperature and turns the body into ashes. This does not hurt the body because it is dead. The ashes are carefully picked up and placed into a special container called an urn. Sometimes urns are kept at the cemetery and sometimes people take them home.

Body vs. Spirit: Many cultures believe that, after a person’s body dies, their spirit, the invisible part of the person that holds their thoughts, memories, and love, goes up to be with God and/or joins the spirits of others who have died before them.

As a parent or caregiver, you have to help yourself before you can be a support to your child. You need to find supportive friends, family members, clergy, or a counselor that can offer you emotional support. Your child, no matter what age, should not be your support. For healthy roles to be maintained and for your child to be able to grieve, you must maintain the parenting role.

Because you may not be emotionally available for your child due to your own grief, try to ensure that others, such as an extended family member or close friend, are around to love and nurture your child. Try to give your child as much consistency and attention as possible. At such an unpredictable time, structure will help children to feel that they are still safe. Maintaining bedtimes and expectations of behavior, and being careful not to spoil the children with lots of things, will assist in creating a sense of normalcy in their lives. If you allow your child to sleep with you, verbalize an expectation that they will return to their beds in a certain time frame. Otherwise you will have a very difficult time getting them to return in the future.

Talk about your loved one with your child. You can cry in front of them as long as you are not crying constantly and feeling out of control of your emotions. Your lack of self-control will frighten them. Model healthy grieving and tell them that it is normal to cry. Your child may not want to talk or cry in front of you for fear of making you sad. This is why it is helpful to have a counselor or other adult that your child can confide in for support.

Cornerstone offers individual counseling and art therapy, support groups for children ages 6-18, monthly workshops, memorial events, and summer camps for children ages 6-16.

Step 1: A parent or legal guardian calls Cornerstone of Hope at (216) 524-3787 and a staff member will take down your basic information. A therapist will call you back to schedule an orientation or intake appointment. If you need advice about your grieving child or teen, the therapist will be happy to answer your questions

Step 2: Scheduling an orientation visit: Often the family likes to come in and get a tour of Cornerstone together. They may or may not be sure of the services they desire. A counselor/therapist can meet with the family to discuss all of the options.

Scheduling an intake for individual counseling: If the adult caregiver desires individual counseling for their children, the therapist will meet him/her (without the children) to collect information and fill out the proper paperwork. At this meeting the therapist will schedule a weekly appointment time with the parent for the child. If the child is to be seen at school, the therapist will contact the parent after arranging a therapy time with the child’s school.

Scheduling an intake for Taking F.L.I.G.H.T. (Families Living In Grief and Healing Together): If the family is going to attend our family support group, we still would like to meet with the parent/caregiver to get some background information on the participants. The family group includes an orientation night plus eight weekly group sessions.

Counselors may be able to see your child at school providing that the school is cooperative and is at a reasonable distance. Cornerstone is also located near an RTA bus stop.

Adult groups are offered without charge to those participating. There is a materials fee of $25 per family for all family groups. Family workshops are typically free, with the exception of a few activities that may happen at the family workshops (e.g., Butterfly release, bowling). Camps are also free of charge. Cornerstone of Hope also provides free babysitting and a light meal/refreshments for all weekly and monthly groups offered.

For individual counseling, there is a one time flat fee based on income level for an unlimited number of individual counseling services, however, no one is denied service based on inability to pay. Please contact us at 216.524.HOPE(4673) for more specific information/rates.

No. Guided by Christian values of compassion and service, Cornerstone of Hope welcomes and serves all seeking support.

A family can call and start the process for participation as soon as they are ready. We believe each person and family grieves differently, and the family is the best judge of when they are ready to deal with the death. However, for families where the loss of a loved one was less than 3 months ago, Cornerstone of Hope requests that you work with one of our counselors on an individual basis. Individuals and families can begin group support as early as three months after the death of a loved one.

Please have them contact us at 216.524.HOPE(4673) for more information. We would also be happy to send you resources about grief and information about Cornerstone of Hope, which you can pass on to your friend at an appropriate time. However, Cornerstone of Hope will not send anything to someone who has not called us personally to request information.

Please review this site, including Grief Resources, for more information. You can also call 211 (First call for Help – United Way) and they will assist you with other grief resources.

Grief is a life-long experience and is not something that you just “get over.” Each person’s grief journey will be different as you learn to live with your grief and integrate it into your life. Initially, grief can be incredibly overwhelming. With time and healing, however, you will find that the intensity of those feelings will be more manageable. This will also be affected by your social support, your personality, the relationship you had with the person who passed away, how the person died, and other factors. While you will not be the same person you were before the loss, it will get better.

Family and friends often feel incredibly uncomfortable with the emotion and the pain of someone who is grieving, and may cause those people to withdraw from or avoid you, which can leave you feeling very alone. It is very important that you are honest about your feelings and where you are in your grief and struggles. It is also helpful to learn how to communicate those feelings to your family, friends, and co-workers in a way that will help them to connect to and understand you better. Cornerstone of Hope can help you to learn these skills, and to support you when you feel most alone.

It is important not to compare yourself to others who are grieving. Every grief experience is unique and various factors affect how each individual handles their grief (personality, coping skills, relationship with their loved one, coping skills, type of death, etc.). There is nothing wrong with the way you grieve. You may find it helpful, however, to learn more about grief and possibly learn additional ways to cope with that grief that will ease the burden you carry.

If it has been several months since the loss of your loved one and you are having trouble getting out of bed, have periods of intense emotions or obsessive thoughts that make functioning difficult, are not enjoying any activity, or have thoughts of self-harm, it is a good time to contact a grief counselor for support.

Grief is not something that you go through in an orderly, step-by-step fashion. With grief, you may feel like you are experiencing a roller-coaster of emotions. Although it is common for people who are grieving to feel such feelings as anger, denial, guilt, etc., the order in which people experience these emotions may vary.

We have seen how important counseling and support can be to those struggling in their grief. We have seen families who find hope again, and learn to adjust to and strengthen their altered family unit. We have seen children who learn that they can talk about their loved one, and have seen communication between families who are grieving vastly improve. With the problem solving and coping skills individuals and families learn in counseling/group support, and with the support of others who understand, we have seen how grief support can bring light to what seems like utter darkness.

• Listen, listen, listen.
• Offer practical support (make a meal, help a newly widowed young mom with laundry or babysitting, take the kids to school, etc.).
• Don’t have unrealistic expectations about how soon or even that someone should “get over it.”
• Allow the person to sit with you in silence. Just be there.
• Avoid the use of clichés such as “Think of all the good times,” and “You can always have another child,” etc.
• Don’t avoid talking about the deceased. Initiate the conversation and encourage the grieving to talk about their loved one.
• Accept that tears are normal and healthy.
• Acknowledge birthdays, anniversaries, the anniversary of the death, etc.
• Accept that you will not be able to make them feel better.